Overcoming Low Self Esteem

As a psychotherapist, one of the many reasons people come to see me is for help in overcoming low self esteem. Self esteem plays a large role in many aspects of our lives; career, relationships, our very happiness.

Many people are unaware of how their self esteem has developed. Essentially, our thoughts create belief patterns and this influences the way we think about ourselves. We come to see these belief patterns as the truth of who we really are. But really, these beliefs are lies that come to influence our behaviours. For so many people, low self esteem stands in the way of living their best lives.

We can overcome low self esteem by changing the way we think about ourselves and more importantly, changing our self talk.

At Harmony Ranch, we use horses to help clients overcome low self esteem. We do this through the use of interactive activities using horses.

One of the most inspiring examples of this was in my work with Johnny. Johnny was 17 yrs old and dealing with severe anxiety and developmental delays. Johnny didn't feel very positive about himself and was often unsure of his ability. But when Johnny was around the horses, things were different. Johnny felt relaxed and accepted among them. There was never any judgment. Horses provide valuable lessons for overcoming low self esteem. They forget the past and live only in the moment. They also never judge or criticize themselves.

One day, Johnny was in the arena working with the horses. In particular, he was working with Laredo, who didn't trust many people. Johnny was trying to get Laredo to allow him to pick up his hoof. As an animal who relies on his feet for escape, it is a significant sign of trust when a horse gives you his hoof.

Johnny tried several times but Laredo stubbornly refused to pick up his foot. When I asked Johnny what he was saying to himself he replied “I CAN'T do it”. We then discussed how Laredo needed to trust him and if he didn't believe in himself, how could Laredo. He agreed and we discussed how Johnny could think differently. Taking a big breath, Johnny stated loudly “ I CAN do it”. Laredo easily lifted his leg into Johnny's hand.

With Laredo's help Johnny was able to find the courage to change his negative thought patterns. Equine assisted therapy provides the opportunity to change negative belief patterns and resulting behaviours. It provides a safe place to try out those behaviours and experience the outcome. Overcoming low self esteem is really about changing our negative self talk and creating the life we want.

For more information on Equine Assisted Therapy please visit www.HarmonyRanch.ca